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5 Reasons Women Aren’t Impressed with Your Online Dating Profile

December 20th, 2011

Attractive, smart, and successful men everywhere may be puzzled by the lack of response to their online dating profiles. This article outlines five top reasons why women may be quick to reject certain men on dating sites.

Online dating is an increasingly popular way for eligible men to meet interesting woman, but, unfortunately, this avenue isn’t immune to the snap judgments and superficial filters commonplace in conventional dating. In fact, because dating sites allow women to effortlessly search, block, and favorite potential mates, creating the illusion of a never ending supply of suitors, guys must be especially careful when crafting their online dating personas to avoid immediate dismissal. Here are some top reasons why your profile might have women quickly fumbling for the back button.

1 – You sound unbelievable full of yourself

Resist the urge to treat your profile like a diary/resume, as you risk appearing painfully self-obsessed. Yes, we want to know more about you, but your 2,000 word essay detailing your ten year ascension into your perfect job just makes you sound pompous and self-aggrandizing. Instead, opt for more generalized language, like ‘successful financial planner,’ or ‘very happy with my job.’ This brings home the point, while still piquing our interests.

2 – Your picture is kind of creepy

Online dating has the distinct advantage of giving users full control of first impressions, making it almost inexcusable to display strange or unflattering pictures. Avoid pictures that were taken from an awkwardly low angle, that include your shower curtain as the backdrop, or that feature you in a fedora. Forgo the hard, aloof expressions best suited for male models, using instead pictures that showcase a warm, genuine smile. Try pictures from a night out with friends or from your best friend’s wedding, as you will likely exude personality and confidence. Just remember to crop, particularly if your buddy is slightly more attractive. And if you like to include body shots, please adhere to a 2:1 ratio of clothed to shirtless photos.

3 – You create unreasonably high expectations

Even a beautiful, confident woman may be taken aback by a laundry list of partner requirements, particularly if they’re mostly superficial. Instead, politely mention deal breakers, such as smoking or having nine cats, while describing a few of your preferences using welcoming language. (“Although, I appreciate women of all shapes, I find myself often attracted to curvy women.”) Refrain from posting any pictures with a svelte, devastating hot friend or ex-girlfriend, as this just invites women to see how they stack up. And, under no circumstances, mention by name any models or actresses who you think are the ‘ideal woman.’ Not only is it exceedingly unlikely you’ll woo her carbon copy, but you run the risk of sending away an attractive women with feelings of inadequacy.

4 -You sound stupid

Yes, you list your occupation as a civil engineer, but your grammar and syntax are deplorable. Is it fair to conclude that you’re unintelligent because you failed to use the past perfect tense while describing your recent vacation? No, but without the benefit of conversation or nonverbal cues, we are forced to use something to gauge your intelligence. So turn off caps lock, spell out any text shorthand, and take ten minutes to copy and paste text into a word processing document for spelling and grammar help. This way we can focus on what a great guy you are, not your inadequate use of punctuation.

5. You sound like you’re looking for sex

If you are actually looking exclusively for casual sex, feel free to skip this one. But for those men who are looking for something more, please be aware that certain words and phrases, such as ‘healthy sex drive’ or ‘enjoys being physical,’ send the message that a shallow, physical relationship is your main objective. Either you will attract women who seek that particular type of relationship or repel the ones who do not. Rest assured that any woman reading your profile assumes you like sex, so don’t feel compelled to needlessly reference your carnal desires. Instead, use that space to describe your most enduring personality characteristics that would make us swoon at the chance to be with you emotionally and sexually.

Remember that the real key to online dating is capturing a woman’s interest enough to set up an offline meeting. With some thoughtful editing and mindfulness to presentation, you can increase your chances of finding a wonderful mate.

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Improving Your Internet Dating Profile

September 26th, 2011

With Internet dating becoming more popular, you need to pay particular attention to your dating profile to increase your chances of finding dates. As competition is fierce on most dating websites, a poor quality profile can significantly dent your success.

Your Username
Most people create an online username without paying too much attention to it, but it can have a big effect on how you come across to other members of the website. This is not that surprising when you consider that your username is often one of the first things that prospective dates will see when they encounter you. Choosing something original and quirky that reflects your personality can draw attention and spark interest.

Your Profile Photograph
If you do not include a photograph as part of your profile, it is likely that it will not receive too many views. Research has suggested that you are eight times more likely to be contacted by other members if you upload a good quality photograph. Most prospective dates will want to see what you look like before making contact with you. Make sure that the photograph is up-to-date. If you upload an older photograph to entice other members, you will not be able to maintain the pretence if one of your admirers wants to meet you.

Be Truthful
It is tempting to expand the truth or even lie to appear more interesting to prospective dates, but this is not the best idea. Lies and half truths are likely to catch up with you sooner or later. Even if this is not the case, being economical with the truth is not the ideal start for a new relationship.

Be Positive
Using active language can make you appear more confident and assertive to prospective dates. For example, you can encourage prospective dates to get in touch with you if they like your profile. It is often a good idea to include a list of qualities that you desire in a partner to discourage responses from members who would not be compatible with your requirements. At the same time, avoid listing the qualities that you do not want in a prospective partner as this can make you come across as too negative and choosy. Generally speaking, positivity will work wonders in terms of how you are perceived.

Your profile can make or break your online dating success, so it makes sense to spend time making it as good as you can. Most people will find that either their “about me” section or photos could be improved, but it is often hard to look at it objectively. If this is the case for you, ask a friend to look over what you’ve done and suggest areas that could be improved. A friend can often suggest or highlight positive aspects about your personality that you hadn’t thought of or weren’t even aware of yourself!

By Sally A

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Online Dating Profile: What Not to Include – Men Seeking Women

March 22nd, 2011

Your online dating profile is your first cyber impression. You want it to encourage women to connect with you. Therefore, knowing what not to include in your profile is just as important as knowing what you should include. The tips in this article may help.

  • Resist the urge to talk about sex. Even if you’d like to let women know that sex is not a priority, try not to mention it. Talking about sex is important in relationships, but generally doesn’t go over well in cyberspace or during an initial contact.
  • Don’t reveal that you are just getting out of a relationship. This may send the message that you’re emotionally unavailable. Women who read through dating profiles may indeed be willing to take a chance on love. However, they also need to know they’ll be valued for who they are and not a band-aid for your broken heart.
  • Limit generic descriptions of yourself. If you can think of at least one other man who fits your profile description, then you need to beef it up a bit. Women want to know what makes you different.
  • Refrain from talking about your financial status (even if you make a lot of money). Women might conclude that you define your self-worth by how much you make. This can be a big red flag for a lot of women.
  • Fight the urge to include a web camera or cell phone picture of yourself (e.g. the ones where you appear distorted while holding the camera or cell phone). A professional photo is not necessary, but at least get someone else to take a more flattering picture of you.

While there is no guarantee that these tips will get you hundreds of potential dates, following them may help your profile stand out above others out there.

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