It’s a sad day when high schools begin to teach about dating violence in the classroom. But the reality is that many teens, especially girls, are going to have troubles with dating violence at one point in their lives.

To help combat this grim reality, those who are new to the dating scene need to keep these rules in mind for themselves as they head out with a new date:

• Always tell someone where you’re going – This way, people can find you if you’ve been gone for too long or they just want to check in on you. If your date changes your dating location at the last minute, refuse to go there until you let someone else know. Or, you can be subtle and just text message the change to a friend.
• Always have a time frame in mind and let others know – Let your friends and family know when you will be back, and then stick to the plan.
• Any sign of violence is a bad sign – Even if your date is just ‘playing rough,’ if it makes you uncomfortable, you need to leave your date, call home and get someone to pick you up.
• If you’ve already experienced violence, you need to tell someone – Even if you don’t think it’s a big deal, letting someone know will help you gain perspective on the situation. And they can help you get the help you need, even if you don’t want to.
• Never go anywhere that’s not public until you feel completely comfortable with someone – This is common sense. Get to know a person first before you head back to their house or to a dark alley.

Dating violence typically happens with someone you know well…or someone you thought you knew. No matter how long you’ve been going out or how much you love this person, any violence is too much violence. You need to get away from this person now, before it’s too late.

Diary Abuse, Love, Violence, Women

There’s usually some pretty clear signs that all is not well in a relationship. However we are often too close and too involved to notice these signs ourselves. Often it takes our friends or family to point them out to us. Being in a relationship for a long period of time can seriously cloud your judgement. Knowing when to give up on a relationship is not as easy at it seems. Sometimes you can find yourself in a bad relationship, a one-sided relationship, or even a destructive relationship without even realising it. This happens simply because you’ve lived with your partner for so long and the relationship may have changed slowly over time, getting progressively worse.

Things that may have been little annoyances at the start may turn into much more serious issues later on. These can appear in many different guises, from partners who are abusive, partners who belittle you in public, who don’t care or show you respect, to those who are jealous, or who are possessive of your time.

So what keeps someone in such a relationship? The most common reasons they don’t just split are:

• Fear of change
• Fear of being alone
• Denial of the situation
• Guilt, especially when kids are involved
• A belief that the partner will change or go back to how they once were
• Putting up with them, because ‘when they are nice they are very nice’
• Being attracted to a ‘dominant’ personality

Unfortunately, getting into these types of relationships in the first place can be a repetitive pattern for some people. How ever much you love someone, it is not a reason for staying in a bad relationship. Don’t waste your life. Get out while you still have time and regain your self-respect. Getting out of a bad relationship is difficult to start with, but it is well worth the heartache and turmoil. Once out, the sunlight that was missing from your life will return, and a few months down the line, you’ll be amazed with yourself as to why you lived in such a situation for so long.

Rejection Abuse, Bad, Dump, Jealous, Love, Possessive, Rejection, Relationship

But not all is happy and cheery in dating land, is it? There are plenty of horror stories that you have heard from your friends and siblings. The woman that picked her nose at the table or the guy that had nose hair that was longer than his moustache – these are people that you might meet. However, there are ways to deal with these hairy situations.

No pun intended.

There are going to be dates that don’t work out for either of you. And chances are good that if you’re uncomfortable, they will be too and realize that you’re lacking in chemistry. But the real question is whether you should cut and run early in the date, or stick it to see if there are some redeeming qualities that you might be missing.

Here are some signs that you should just end the date:

• They insult you and it’s not in a nervous teasing sort of way
• They insult your family or friends
• They have beliefs that you don’t agree with
• They are abusive in any way

And here are some signs that you might want to stick it out:

• They apologize profusely for things that might be perceived as negative
• They are respectful of you
• It’s just their looks that you’re having troubles with

In the end, you might be able to get past the nose hair, so unless there’s something painfully mismatched about your date, why not go the adventurous route and see if you might have found your new spouse?

Diary Abuse, Bad Dates, Chemistry, Compatibility, Horror, Nerves