Ever since the fiasco involving “gate crashers” at a state dinner at the White House earlier this year, the subject of gate crashers has been more and more in the news lately. While the Secret Service is all focused on preventing this sort of thing from happening again at the White House, in the world of online dating the subject of gate crashers has come to the forefront.

What are online dating gate crashers? They are, quite simply, people who join and participate on niche dating sites without actually falling into that niche group. So for instance, on a specialty online dating site focusing on Jewish singles there are lots of members who really aren’t Jewish at all. They don’t necessarily lie about their religious affiliation because the site lets them select from a number of options (including “not active in the Jewish faith”) but they knowingly go onto the site looking for other singles when they have no history of being Jewish and no intention of converting.

The result? Frustration, for the most part. Imagine yourself as someone for whom religious faith is important, going out on a date with someone you met on the site. Now imagine what happens when you find out that apparently terrific person isn’t really part of your preferred faith after all. Another popular target for the “date crashing” crowd is the niche sites focusing on matchmaking wealthy clients. But that’s the subject of my next post.

The lesson here is to make sure you confirm details such as this during the “get to know you” phase of online interaction. This is especially important if you are looking for someone via a specialty or niche dating site. If that niche quality is really important to you then it’s in your best interest to verify the other person feels it is just as important as well.

Dating Essentials Gate Crashers, Lies, Money, Niche Dating, Religion

Sure, the elections in the U.S. are over, but that doesn’t mean some people have turned off all political thought. In a world where liberal thinkers and conservative thinkers co-exist, there will most certainly come a time when you’re on a date with someone who is the complete opposite of you in terms of political opinion.

So, what happens then?

For some couples, they have successfully managed polar opposite political thoughts, enjoying the opportunity to be with someone who shows them the other side of the debate.

For others – if you’re not what they are, you might want to leave. NOW.

This is why it’s generally sage advice to avoid the political discussion until later in the relationship. You’re not avoiding the topic, but merely putting it on the backburner in order to focus on getting to know the person before knowing their ideals.

(And in truth, most people’s political colors will shine through, even if they aren’t mentioned.)

Of course, this does beg the question: do you dump someone just because they don’t agree with you? Seems a little silly when you put it that way, for certain, but just as with religion and babies, some ideals are deal breakers in relationships.

And if politics is one, you need to be upfront from the start. That way, you can both cast your ballots the way you want and you both find someone to love who believes in you as much as they believe in their opinions.

Conversation Topics Compatibility, Debate, Dump, Opposites, Politics, Religion

This is your year. You can feel it.

No more sitting at home on the weekend, no more heading to the grocery store for yet another frozen dinner – no sir. You are going to find that special someone this year.

Sure, it’s going to take effort, sacrifice and hard work, but unlike the weight loss resolution you make every year, these online dating resolutions are easier to stick with.

Ready?

First of all, you need to find an online dating service that makes sense to you. Whether you choose a dating service that’s suited to your religion or your hobbies, pick a site where you feel at home and where you feel like you could date everyone that’s listed.

Next, make sure to interact with other singles on these sites. If you simply sit and wait for people to come to you, that’s no fun. You need to show that you’re just as interested as others are.

Finally, make sure you are going on dates from time to time. Living in virtual reality with online dating is easy – but if you want to find love, you need to take it to the next level. Casual dates can be a fun way to see if you click in real life, while also giving you more practice in dating altogether.

Welcome in 2008! It’s going to be a great year.

Dating Essentials, Tips and Ideas Date Ideas, Hobbies, Religion