We all have seen the commercials and heard the hype about how some dating sites use “scientific” methods to match people based on personal characteristics, compatibility, and the like. But does this really work? Is there any evidence to show that there truly is a science to matchmaking? The answer is, it depends.

Let’s start with what it means to take a scientific approach to matching singles with each other. For paid online dating sites like eHarmony.com and Match.com, this means taking known research about the things that tend to cause marriages to fail (smoking, age differences, lack of common interests, etc.) and using this information to match people together. The theory is if they can minimize the problem areas that often lead to divorce in the first place, they can match singles more successfully and get better results.

The problem has been in actually verifying this as a successful matchmaking method. EHarmony.com and Match.com recently published their “success rates”, but these are put out there in terms such as the number of emails exchanged per year, the number of “winks” sent out each year, and the number of dates their users go on each year. This is interesting information (mostly for advertisers) but doesn’t necessarily help determine if their matching methods succeed where it really counts – helping you find someone special to share your life.

Do I think dating sites that use this approach are necessarily bad? No, of course not. There are plenty of singles who have found partners using this kind of approach. All I’m saying is it’s a good idea to have an objective view of what they’re offering and promising if you’re going to choose to use their services.

Relationships eHarmony, Match.com, Matchmaking, Science, Success

You hear all of the horror stories -that online dating is scary, dangerous, or, even worse, unsuccessful.

But are these just old wives’ tales?

The truth is that online dating IS successful – a lot. But you might have to adjust your definition of success for as moment.

Are you going to meet someone who is perfect? Probably not. But you will meet people who share your interests. And then you at least have the chance that you could have a love hook up.

Dating is the goal of online dating, isn’t it? Marriage is a great side effect, but that’s not what you should be aiming for right from the start. You should be aiming to meet people, and to have a little fun.

And with the expectation of having fun, how can anything go wrong?

So, the advice to take from this posting today is to go into dating with an open mind. Get to know that other person, enjoy their company, and when things are going well, just have fun.

When you’re relaxed, you’re often more yourself and often you tend to let little things go – the little things that might cause you to break up with someone before you fall in love with them.

Relax a little and enjoy online dating – it’s going to work. Maybe not today, but it will.

Dating Essentials Breaking Up, Fun, Success

You have a strategy for everything in your life – moving, your job, your schedule, etc. But when it comes to dating, we seem to think that having a strategy somehow takes the ‘fun’ out of it. However, if you’re spending more nights alone than you might like, maybe it’s time to stop hoping for love and to start scoping for love.

Using a strategy.

While different strategies have worked for different people, there are many that have been used time and time again with success. Online dating is a complicated process, but here’s what you need to do to get started. We’ll cover some other techniques next week too.

Be specific – When you’re trying to find a dating site, try to find one that caters to your specific likes (and dislikes). This isn’t about finding a person to date; this search should be about finding THE person who you want to spend time with.

Positivity matters – Focus on what you want, as opposed to what you don’t want. You want prospective people you date to think you’re a happy and outgoing person who looks for the good in everything… unless you’re on a dating site that wants you to be negative.

Showcase your talents and hobbies – Don’t be afraid to talk about what you can do. This is something that will set you apart from the rest of the crowd.

Need more? Stay tuned.

Dating Essentials Alone, Hobbies, Love, Meet People, Positive, Success